after all that had happened, my expectations of a true friend is perhaps more farfetched than ever.

now, i know who are those whom i can REALLY count on to be there for me. perhaps, only that few. the rest who are always with me might seem as if they are my true friends, but no. they are just people whom i seek just for the sake of the companionship and fun. just casual friends. my thinkings are different now. people whom i used to think are my best friends are now, only casual friends to me. so which category do you think you fall into? i'm not trying to pin-point anyone here. really. so, no offence arh(:

whatever happened to 'best friends', i have no idea.
but i guess time will do the job of forgetting, and essentially, forgiving. but it isn't easy giving the person who hurt you another chance to walk into your life again. after the hurt that had been inflicted, i'm perhaps more wary now. i don't want things to repeat again. i'm afraid.

the stress that's building up is tormenting me as well.
to the extend that i might just sit in front of my books and cry till i can't cry anymore, and go back to my books. i don't wanna disappoint anyone with my results.

okay, pardon me. i'd been on emo rides for the past few days that i could hardly really smile. almost too much for me to take. all hail me.
after all these rantings, its time for me to pick myself up again and move on. gear up siqi!

anyway, thanks to all those who sent your regards and concerns! you all are soo fabulous(: really, a truckloads of thanks! loveees. i'm better i guess.

i realised His people are all soo lovely.
i know its gonna be alright with Him around.